It's hard to believe that I only have one more year of high school. It's even harder to believe that I almost graduated early and threw away this precious year. A year seems like such a long time, but I know it's going to fly by. So it's time for me to start asking myself seriously, "What do you want to be when you grow up?". The easy answer is a wife and mother. But what about college? What should I do while I'm waiting on a husband?
Asbury University has been my dream school every since I can remember. My parents went there and so did three of my siblings. It was kind of like a second home. I know the campus, I know some people up there, and they have an excellent music program. It was a life changing place for each of my family members and I was eager to experience it. It wasn't till a few months ago that I started having doubts about it. I went to visit last September and it didn't feel like I thought it would. Granted, I was having a terrible week, but still. The apathetic and almost resenting attitudes that filled Chapel was discouraging. I've held Asbury in such high regards all my life and I looked forward to being in a place where everyone shared the same passion for Christ as I do. I'm just really scared of getting there and having all my expectations crash around me.
On the other hand, where else would I go? I've been looking at other colleges and possibly studying abroad, but I don't know those places. I know Asbury. Plus, I'm really interested in their Worship Arts major. It's just frustrating how sure you can be about something and then all of a sudden you're full of doubts and concerns. Decisions are just never easy.
Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.
What amazing lyrics....
All I know is that I serve an Almighty God who cares about my decisions and will guide me if I just trust Him !
Blogging is so constructive. I start out in a tizzy and by the end of it, I realize how ridiculous my worrying is and I'm reminded to just put my trust in God. It's good to be back in the blogging world :)
